Why do we hold everyone to the standards of Christianity when only God can do that? We look at our neighbors and friends and judge them by rules that have no meaning for them. Our illegitimately pregnant neighbor, our partying co-worker, our cousin addicted to pornography. But without Christ, why would they have any reason to abstain from these things. Sure they are unproductive and unfulfilling, but in the momentary, they're fun. All sin is.
We should certainly hold other Christians to these standards, but we step into some messy territory when we take those standards elsewhere. We need to let God do that and relegate ourselves to helping them simply find God. JM